Friday, November 21, 2014

5 Things About Threenagers

We've all heard the phrase "the terrible twos"....although those "twos" are more like 18 months to about 5 or so.
I'm in the middle of this stage with Hudson, or as I also call it "The Threenager" stage.

*This picture's a year old but I just love it.*

Here are 5 things you need to know about your threenager. 
I could share more, but ain't nobody got time for that. You do have a 3 year old, after all. (or you might someday)

1. They're little tyrants. Oh, you thought you were the boss just because you're the parent?? Haha, that was your first mistake. Learn this now, your 3 year old IS the boss. The sooner you figure this out, the happier you'll all be.

2. They're never happy. Seriously. Much like men see women, "threenagers" don't know what they want. You think that chocolate chip cookie you finally gave into after they've been whining about it for the last 3.5 hours is going to satisfy them? Rookie move. It might pacify them for a short time, but wait for it. Next it'll be that toy they saw in the store 17 weeks ago that they just now remembered, a grape (NOT cherry, are you crazy?) popsicle, they're mad because you had the audacity to turn the sound machine off in their room and didn't let them, or wait...a tiny drop of water got on their pants so now they absolutely must (with every ounce of ferventness inside them) change clothes. Not just pants. All of it.

3. They live off of fruit snacks and air. (and grape popsicles) OK, a little dramatic, but it is shocking the sheer amount of Welch's fruit snacks a kid wants to consume in a day. Sometimes it's not worth the battle and you should just let them have their 17th pack and move on. Kidding....just 13. ;-)

4. They are loud. Imagine someone who's a loud talker yelling into a megaphone, while simultaneously popping bubble wrap in your ear....and multiply that by 27. That's almost the decibel at which a 3 year old operates on the regular.

5. They still love their mommas. And daddies. They may be messy, loud, sometimes bossy and rude, but they love you more than anything. You are their world. Have patience with them, and most importantly, instruct them on how to express their feelings, how to play well with others, and how to be a respectful, productive citizen of the threenager stage.

I've already decided that when the twins hit the threenager stage, they'll just enjoy a trip to boarding school for a couple years or so. ;-) Joke! But seriously.

*Just for disclosure, I certainly do not let my child be the boss in the house, nor does he eat 13 (or 17) packs of fruit snacks a day. It's more like 2. Trust me, he gets disciplined, and he eats healthy foods. 

Have a super weekend!


  1. You could not be more correct on any of these. The fruit snacks and air?? Right there with ya!! She has been on a food strike for months.


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